Devotionals
Kids Say the Funniest Things
A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible ~~ Psalm 23.  She gave the youngsters a month to learn the verse.  Little Bobby was excited about the task, but he just could remember the Psalm.  After much practice, he could barely get past the first line.  On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Bobby was so nervous.  When it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my Shepherd......and that is all I need to know!"
 
When a mother saw a thunderstorm forming in mid-afternoon, she worried about her 7 year old daughter who would be walking the 3 blocks from school to home.  Decided to meet her, the mother saw her daughter walking nonchalantly along, stopping to smile whenever lightning flashed.  Seeing her mother, the little girl ran to her, explaining happily, "All the way home, God's been taking my picture!"
 
A mother took her 3 year old daughter to church for the first time.  The church lights were lowered and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying lighted candles.  All was quiet until the little one started to sing in a loud voice, "Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you....."
 
A little boy walked down the beach, as as he did, he spied a matronly woman sitting under a beach umbrella on the sand.  He walked up to her and asked, "Are you a Christian?"  "Yes."  "Do you read your Bible every day?"  She nodded her head, "Yes."  "Do you pray often?" the boy asked next, and again she answered, "Yes."  With that he asked his final question, "Will you hold my quarter while I go swimming?"
 
A Sunday School teacher asked her class, "Does anyone here know what we mean by sins of omission?"  A small girl replied, "Aren't those the sins we should have committed, but didn't."
 
A father was reading Bible stories to his young son.  He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked bak and was turned to salt."  His son asked, "What happened to the flea?"
 
Six-year old Angie and her 4 year old brother Joel were sitting together in church.  Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud.  Finally, his big sister had enough.  "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church."  "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked.  Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door?  The hushers."
 
 

Evening, September 16
Today's Morning Reading
"Am I a sea, or a whale, that thou settest a watch over me?" - Job 7:12

This was a strange question for Job to ask of the Lord. He felt himself to be too insignificant to be so strictly watched and chastened, and he hoped that he was not so unruly as to need to be so restrained. The enquiry was natural from one surrounded with such insupportable miseries, but after all, it is capable of a very humbling answer. It is true man is not the sea, but he is even more troublesome and unruly. The sea obediently respects its boundary, and though it be but a belt of sand, it does not overleap the limit. Mighty as it is, it hears the divine hitherto, and when most raging with tempest it respects the word; but self-willed man defies heaven and oppresses earth, neither is there any end to this rebellious rage. The sea, obedient to the moon, ebbs and flows with ceaseless regularity, and thus renders an active as well as a passive obedience; but man, restless beyond his sphere, sleeps within the lines of duty, indolent where he should be active. He will neither come nor go at the divine command, but sullenly prefers to do what he should not, and to leave undone that which is required of him. Every drop in the ocean, every beaded bubble, and every yeasty foam-flake, every shell and pebble, feel the power of law, and yield or move at once. O that our nature were but one thousandth part as much conformed to the will of God! We call the sea fickle and false, but how constant it is! Since our fathers' days, and the old time before them, the sea is where it was, beating on the same cliffs to the same tune; we know where to find it, it forsakes not its bed, and changes not in its ceaseless boom; but where is man-vain, fickle man? Can the wise man guess by what folly he will next be seduced from his obedience? We need more watching than the billowy sea, and are far more rebellious. Lord, rule us for thine own glory. Amen.

-- C.H.Spurgeon Morning and Evening Daily Devotional