Devotionals
Kids Say the Funniest Things
A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible ~~ Psalm 23.  She gave the youngsters a month to learn the verse.  Little Bobby was excited about the task, but he just could remember the Psalm.  After much practice, he could barely get past the first line.  On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Bobby was so nervous.  When it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my Shepherd......and that is all I need to know!"
 
When a mother saw a thunderstorm forming in mid-afternoon, she worried about her 7 year old daughter who would be walking the 3 blocks from school to home.  Decided to meet her, the mother saw her daughter walking nonchalantly along, stopping to smile whenever lightning flashed.  Seeing her mother, the little girl ran to her, explaining happily, "All the way home, God's been taking my picture!"
 
A mother took her 3 year old daughter to church for the first time.  The church lights were lowered and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying lighted candles.  All was quiet until the little one started to sing in a loud voice, "Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you....."
 
A little boy walked down the beach, as as he did, he spied a matronly woman sitting under a beach umbrella on the sand.  He walked up to her and asked, "Are you a Christian?"  "Yes."  "Do you read your Bible every day?"  She nodded her head, "Yes."  "Do you pray often?" the boy asked next, and again she answered, "Yes."  With that he asked his final question, "Will you hold my quarter while I go swimming?"
 
A Sunday School teacher asked her class, "Does anyone here know what we mean by sins of omission?"  A small girl replied, "Aren't those the sins we should have committed, but didn't."
 
A father was reading Bible stories to his young son.  He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked bak and was turned to salt."  His son asked, "What happened to the flea?"
 
Six-year old Angie and her 4 year old brother Joel were sitting together in church.  Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud.  Finally, his big sister had enough.  "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church."  "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked.  Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door?  The hushers."
 
 

Evening, August 30
Today's Morning Reading
"Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed." - Jeremiah 17:14
"I have seen his ways, and will heal him." - Isaiah 57:18

It is the sole prerogative of God to remove spiritual disease. Natural disease may be instrumentally healed by men, but even then the honour is to be given to God who giveth virtue unto medicine, and bestoweth power unto the human frame to cast off disease. As for spiritual sicknesses, these remain with the great Physician alone; he claims it as his prerogative, "I kill and I make alive, I wound and I heal;" and one of the Lord's choice titles is Jehovah-Rophi, the Lord that healeth thee. "I will heal thee of thy wounds," is a promise which could not come from the lip of man, but only from the mouth of the eternal God. On this account the psalmist cried unto the Lord, "O Lord, heal me, for my bones are sore vexed," and again, "Heal my soul, for I have sinned against thee." For this, also, the godly praise the name of the Lord, saying, "He healeth all our diseases." He who made man can restore man; he who was at first the creator of our nature can new create it. What a transcendent comfort it is that in the person of Jesus "dwelleth all the fulness of the Godhead bodily!" My soul, whatever thy disease may be, this great Physician can heal thee. If he be God, there can be no limit to his power. Come then with the blind eye of darkened understanding, come with the limping foot of wasted energy, come with the maimed hand of weak faith, the fever of an angry temper, or the ague of shivering despondency, come just as thou art, for he who is God can certainly restore thee of thy plague. None shall restrain the healing virtue which proceeds from Jesus our Lord. Legions of devils have been made to own the power of the beloved Physician, and never once has he been baffled. All his patients have been cured in the past and shall be in the future, and thou shalt be one among them, my friend, if thou wilt but rest thyself in him this night.

-- C.H.Spurgeon Morning and Evening Daily Devotional